The feedback I got from my last video was all positive, so I asked my friends what I could improve on, and they said that the beginning wasn't captivating or interesting enough. I decided that was the part of my pitch to improve on.
Based on this feedback, I changed the beginning of my pitch to try to grab more of the attention of the person listening. I also tried to make the overall pitch flow better, which resulted in it being about 10 seconds shorter than my previous pitch. I think this makes the pitch stronger and easier to understand.
I really like this idea! I'd personally enjoy seeing this become an actual mobile app but I do have some concerns with it. It may be easy for users to abuse this app and use it for things other than its intended purpose, and it may lead to issues such as harassment. As far as your pitch itself, I thought you did a great job! You sounded very confident and I like how you were able to use a full range of motion while speaking. I'd appreciate it if you were to look at my post http://triedfortime.blogspot.com/2016/02/elevator-pitch-no-2-technically-1.html
ReplyDeleteHey Nicole! It was awesome how you had a nice attention grabber at the start of your video it really set the tone for the rest of your app pitch. I, too, have an app that is supposed to connect people (not to others like in your case, more so with their country that they are studying abroad in). Your confidence was there and I'm impressed with your ability to sell your idea. Check out my blog if you're curious: http://ent3003anneperry.blogspot.com.es/2016/02/elevator-pitch-no-2.html
ReplyDeleteHey! I think this is a great idea! As someone who was the only one to come to UF from their high school something like this would have be super useful last fall! There definitely is a market for this type of app. You did a great job on your pitch itself. You seemed really relaxed and well rehearsed which made it easy to watch. Great job! Here's the link to mine http://ufent3003.blogspot.com/2016/02/elevator-pitch-2-week-7.html
ReplyDeleteHi Nicole! I really liked the changes you made, the beginning of your pitch really grabbed my attention and kept me interested throughout. As for your app, I also think that's a great idea and would do very well, especially since UF has a lot of out of state students and provides an easy way for shyer students to connect with other students they may know. Here's the link to my elevator pitch: http://hmilam95.blogspot.com/2016/02/elevator-pitch-no-2.html
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